Tuesday, March 20, 2012

My Visit With Grandma and Grandpa

My family is huge. On both sides. They are a loud, opinionated. passionate, loving, and a little crazy bunch, but I love them all dearly. I have family spread out all over the west coast, from Southern California all the way up to Washington, where my parents live. I don't get to see the family that lives far away that often.Usually only when babies are born, graduations, weddings, and the occasional reunion or vacation. But when we do get to see each other it is a great time.

Tonight I got a surprise call from my Grandparents from Santa Rosa, CA. They were down in LA for the night and wanted to know if I could go see them. It was such a great surprise at the end of the day to get and to have the opportunity to spend some time with them before they headed back north. I drove down there after work and met up with them at their hotel. We went to dinner and talked the night away and were able to catch up on our lives.

I think the best part about seeing them, for me, is realizing how the relationships change with adults as you become one. Sometimes I forget that I am not a little girl anymore. That my parents, friends, grandparents people in general see me as an adult. Well, maybe not people in general, or people who just met me. I know I look really young, and act even younger so I am sure people think I am an immature high schooler sometimes, but aside from that, people do see me as an adult. That honestly brings a bit of responsibility and scariness that I am not ready for.

I can't wait around to get into something that I really want to do. Or wait to pursue my dream until I'm older and wiser, because I get the feeling that there is no magic age where you feel grown up or where you decide that you know enough. I feel like these grown ups that I have been looking at my whole lives for answers are just guessing too. They know what they did and what worked for them and try to give you the best advice they can. I guess that that is how everyone is, just guessing, making the best decisions they can with the information that they have. Thats normal I feel.

But how can you be an adult if you don't feel like that? I mean it is easy to feel like "Well, I am paying off my school loans then my life will start!" Or "After my long distance boyfriend and I get married, my real life will begin." Or even, "I'll be responsible and start living my life and accomplishing things when I am a grown up" I guess it just reinforces that you need to seize the day, live your life, and start working towards the things that you want to accomplish, because you are a grown up. I am a grown up.

I am a grown up.


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